What are your deepest DESIRES?
Replace your resolutions this year with fulfilling your deepest DESIRES…
As we approach the end of a year and the beginning of a new year it is a natural time to really reflect in your life and get really clear… what is it that you deeply desire for yourself? The change you maybe haven’t admitted or acknowledged that you want or the change you have really wanted but can’t ever seem to make.
This is not a question to take lightly. Really look and get quiet to feel out and DEFINE what do you really desire? There is nothing wrong with desire to create positive change in your life, like Martin Luther King and “I have a dream”, know what you want!
Having desire also doesn’t mean you have to be unhappy or unsatisfied with where you are, in fact having dissatisfaction now creates negative feelings that are NOT in alignment with where you want to be (and you want to be creating that congruency now, so love where you are at now and through love manifest your dreams).
Now that you know what you want, EXAMINE – why do you want this? Your why is going to be your driving force and yet did your mind just go blank when I asked this? Isn’t it funny how sometimes we really want something and yet when we ask why it’s not entirely clear.
Maybe you want money or a rockin’ beach body… totally fine, but why? What do you want to do with the money specifically? And what will the hard body mean for you?
Again, dig deep. No judgment… what you want and why is personal, what ever you choose there is nothing wrong with it. The question “why” may create a shift in what you want and you can revisit the Define Desire step if that was the case for you.
Once you have gotten clear about what you really desire for yourself and why, SEE yourself having reached these goals – what do you look like, feel like, have in your life? Again, get a very clear picture of yourself having achieved and accomplished what you really want. Feel it and write it down.
The next step is very important because the truth is that we can want things and never ever get them. Why? Because as you may have heard before, “if you do what you’ve always done you get what you’ve always got” -Mark Twain (or Tony Robbins).
To create change we have to get into action with our eyes wide open, knowing what you want and why. Then knowing what your obstacles are and how to overcome them!
INQUIRE – what gets in the way of you achieving your goals?
- not the right support
- you lose motivation
- influence of those around you
- bad habits
IMPLEMENT – solutions to your obstacles (get way more specific than these solutions. They have to be clear, relevant and actionable to you).
- hiring (or trading for) a coach, a personal trainer, cook
- creating clear action steps to achieve that goal on a daily basis and an accountability system
- joining groups to surround yourself around people with positive influence
- letting go of relationships that don’t serve
- creating new habits
REFINE - in this process you will take all that you have written and distill the most powerful pieces into a few paragraphs that you will EXPERIENCE, read and meditate on (or feel into) for a few minutes every morning and every evening in 2011 (download the worksheet below for more detail).
This will solidify and maintain your connection to your intentions and actions to create what you really want on an everyday basis. For added power, every morning when you are sitting with your intentions, write down 3 action steps for the day to achieve what you desire and in the evening check off your accomplishments.
SUCCEED – Here’s to a beautiful committed day of your DESIRES, everyday.
Here’s a recap and better yet download the worksheet below and fulfill your DESIRES this year!!
D.E.S.I.R.E.S.
- Define – what you want
- Examine – your why
- See – yourself there
- Inquire/Implement – what are your obstacles and what are the solutions
- Refine – write it out specifically
- Experience – everyday read, feel and live your desires
- Succeed – enjoy your DESIRES
Do you want to Fulfill your DESIRES this year?
I have a GIFT for you!
Download the DESIRES Worksheet and get clear!
AND I am giving away FREE 20 minute fulfill your DESIRES laser coaching strategy session for the the New Year.
There are limited sessions available the first week of the New Year so CONTACT ME now to schedule and create the life you want!
Feeling the Pain of Contraction Leads to the Joy of Expansion
Have you ever noticed after you do something big in life you start to retreat right after? Expansion and contraction are cyclical and inevitable. Like the expansion of being pregnant, the contraction of labor pains, and giving birth – expanding into something new in life.
I experienced this just last week. We had an amazing successful launch of our virtual detox program, Make it Real, Make it Raw. We ended up with over 500 people that signed up, our facebook group was connecting, and we were getting emails about how this experience has literally changed lives. I have felt so honored to have been able to lead this event with my partner Thomas Radtke and am so grateful for our amazing community that jumped on board to celebrate their health and radiance with us. This really has been a dream come true experience for me.
The week after our event was Thanksgiving. Gratitude was easy. Staying open… more challenging. We have so much more to share in our up coming program, the Living Radiant Triple Pack but I was finding it difficult to put it out there. I was in contraction, which was painful… and I gave myself lots of love through it because I am very aware of this cycle. I know that through this contraction the expansion is inevitable and through it I will be able to share even more gifts with my lovely community. So I show up again.
Playing a bigger game, being a mentor, showing up and continually working, learning and growing myself is really hard and I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I encourage you to look at your life and see where do you shrink up? What makes you want to run and hide? What are you not doing in your life in order to stay comfortable?
Feeling the pain of contraction leads to the joy of expansion. Remember this in the times when you feel the contraction because if you look at it as just a necessary cycle into the gift that is right on the other side of it, it makes the moment of pain bearable to be with and eventually even lovable. What are you giving birth to in your life? What are you creating?
Sometimes the cycle happens many times in ONE day even… other times the cycles are more slow growing. Think about your life and how you feel right now. Do you feel contracted or expanded? Hiding or living out loud? Can you give yourself permission to live in both states with love and grace. This is my wish for you as I step into my own feeling of gratitude for contraction… I really do know what’s on the other side.
In love and expansion, in gentle retreats, where ever you are, you are amazing!
Leap in Life
I am a leaper. I know this. I watch myself do things that I had no idea I was going to do and just do them. I want to emphasize that it is not because I’m fearless or have more courage than others. I think where it comes from is trust and a deeper knowing, even when I am scared out of my mind.
It’s also from not hesitating. Once you pause and start to think about something too much the momentum is lost and the mind takes over the analysis of why you shouldn’t do it.
Maybe it looks impractical… I consider myself very practical though. Others could disagree. How practical is it to take off to India 3 weeks after deciding to go to a teacher training, or massage school when I had only had one massage in my life and didn’t know if I’d like doing them, or buy a house with someone I’d only known for 3 months in a place I had only spent a week. The thing that was always present when I was taking these leaps was a mysterious feeling of yes when these opportunities arouse.
The list goes on and the last few weeks are no exception. I’m still catching my breath in fact. Leaping consistently is hard work 
On a gut feeling I had gone to California to a women’s business conference a few weeks ago. I left there as a member of Sheri McConnell’s Mastermind for next year. I had NO idea this was going to happen. This may not mean anything to you but it’s a high end coaching program and I won’t even say the price because my mother will probably read this 
.
What I know is that I have NEVER regretted investing in myself. It is something I have done huge amounts of every year. I used to think, “once I’ve done this training” or that, I wouldn’t need to invest anymore at least for a while. Well I have given up that thought now completely because I realize, I always want to learn and grow. What better thing to create the budget for… your own evolution.
This last week another huge leap was running Make it Real, Make it Raw Detox Blast, a Raw Food and Yoga Virtual Event I created with Thomas Radtke. We had over 450 people sign up for the event and it was amazing. Creating this kind of community of people wanting to celebrate health and radiance has been a dream come true!
Common excuses to not leap…
- No money
- No time
- No support
All of these things can be created. Get creative and do it! I believe in you.
What is the real reason for not leaping? It’s a mindset. It’s living in a paradigm where things are impossible. When you begin to realize that literally there are a multitude of paradigms that you can live from… why not choose one in which you are limitless. It honestly is a choice, “argue for your limitations and sure enough they are yours”- Richard Bach. In no way am I talking about going out and being completely irresponsible. It’s about expansion of your mind and what is possible for you and then the practical down to earth strategy on how it is possible – leaving room for the mystery of the unknown of HOW things come to be. Clarity, Intention, Attraction, Action, Manifestation. C I AAM = See, I am anything I want to be.
The Detox Blast!
WOW! I have so much to write about but I am taking a week off while having an AMAZING time with our Make it Real Make it Raw Detox Blast community (over 500 peeps)! The feedback has been incredible – come see the group on facebook!
To sign up click on the header below! I’m filled with gratitude for this amazing group experience!
Being a Conscious Foodie
I was in New York City last week doing one of my favorite things… eating amazing food. At dinner with a friend, I started zealously proclaiming my love for healthy, whole, fresh, raw wondrous food.
I expounded on this for quite sometime and laughed at how passionate I could be about it. Surprisingly enough, I was eating quite a simple salad at the time, not some gourmet entree, but whoa the quality was stunning. The greens and sprouts had a fullness and texture that was unlike our typical store bought organic greens.
Later, I was on twitter interacting with Michelle @eatniks and in her profile she wrote, “obsessed with food”. How liberating I thought to use those words in a positive way because after all that really is what a foodie is anyway, right?
I thought about how much shame is associated with food obsession and how being a “conscious foodie” could help channel “disorders” and unhealthy relationships with food into a rich, full, fun experience with embracing our obsession with food – which maybe I’ll dare to say we all have, since without it we would not survive and thrive. I know semantics police might come after me for that but I’ll take a stand for it anyway since this obsession with food turned positive, instead of some notion that it should be eradicated, could really transform the culture of our unconscious food behaviors.
How to Be a Conscious Foodie
- Awareness of food and where it comes from. Now I realize if you take that literally it can be daunting to track down where this exact carrot came from but what I mean is to understand the food industry – global and local. Knowing what that means and why it’s important to know. There are awesome books and documentaries about this and here’s just a few – Barbara Kingsolver’s Animal, Vegetable, Miracle; Michael Pollan’s The Omnivores Dilemma and for documentaries – King Corn and Food Inc. If it is possible for you to know exactly where your food comes from that is beautiful and I wish that for all of us!
- Noticing your conditioned default patterns towards food. This is a big one. Knowing this is key to knowing how to navigate your self with food. So for me, I know I am conditioned that I should eat everything on my plate… so I need to plate lightly and add more if I need. If I let myself get too hungry I’ll eat anything (well not truly, but I eat things I know I don’t want in my diet). Do you have the thought “I need more” before you even begin? Do you eat more or less in social situations?
- Being present to sensations of eating – tastes, textures, fullness. Having a sensual relationship with your food is key to being a conscious foodie. To be present and fully take it in with awareness, pleasure, love and appreciation. Wow that alone takes you to a whole other way of being!
What do you think it means to be a conscious foodie? What are some of your default patterns toward food? Eat, enjoy, love, laugh and honor your food! Come and join us in being conscious foodies together in our virtual Make it Real, Make it Raw Detox Blast – starting in less than a week!!
Has a Hug Ever Changed Your Whole Experience of Something?
Last weekend I attended the Raw Spirit Festival in Prescott, AZ. I went there by myself and was really excited to be with people celebrating health. Radiance is my number one passion and it is rare to be with a huge number of people with the same passion. So a weekend of raw food, yoga, and my tribe… what could be better? Well, even though I’m a Leo and have leadership, playfulness, and yes- can even take center stage… I’m also naturally quite introverted and can be shy. So when I show up to events by myself I have to take a deep breath and dive in (or sometimes retreat and give myself space 
).
I was determined to be involved here, knowing these are people I share so much with. I connected with many people and had some serendipitous encounters as well. It was good… but just good. I knew I was in a bit of a bubble. Holding back and showing up at the same time. Resistance was coming up to fully engaging from the heart. At night there was music… really, really great music (Shakti Tribe and Jaya Lakshmi) and a chance to really get into the body and dance. I was having fun but there was still a separateness inside of me. Some one bumped me from behind and I turned to a 6′ 7″ guy and he opened his arms. It was a hug that opened my heart. Something that can only be felt, a deepening of connection with no stories, just being and recognizing of the beauty within all of us. Whew. Really, I was blown open and then I really had fun… resonating so deeply with the music which was so full of the heart I had just experienced, the one which we truly are. Feeling the rhythm and being so grateful for musicians, artists, and creatives that can reach us in places that are so powerful and moving if we are open enough to notice. And grateful for my stranger friend who opened his arms and reminded me of feeling 100% home and in my body and heart.
The next morning, still feeling open and present, I went to r.r. Shakti’s beautiful yoga class. In it she asked, “what is it to be raw?”. I knew my answer immediately. To be Real. I had just named a detox program that my business partner (Thomas Radtke) and I have coming up Make it Real, Make it Raw… so her question really resonated with me. To be raw, to be real… open, alive, radiant, honest, vulnerable, whole, fresh, juicy. Then she asked, “what keeps us from being raw?”. I said temptation. To processed food, to our thoughts our minds. Shakti expounded on our over processed thinking and it’s so true. That’s all that had kept me from just being, previous to my open hearted hugger, Eric (which I told him he would knock Amma Ji out with his hugs ).
What is it to be Real? To be Raw? How do you keep yourself from showing up fully?
What can you do to challenge yourself to engage more fully, be more present, remember your truth… your love?
With all my love, my gratitude. And a shout out to the huggers, the lovers, dreamers, yogis, musicians, artists, and people who dare to be raw and real… even if you do intimidate me sometimes with your freedom and truth… and at other times I am you.
Friends are Amazing!
I went out to dinner with a dear friend of mine last night… actually we’ve been friends since we were 2! We were talking about relationships (as women love to do) and just marveling at how important girlfriends are. We are both in great relationships so that’s not an issue and yet there is something we get from spending time with close girlfriends that just can’t be replaced.
Friendship and community have come up a lot for me in the past year. My life has been very transient for a long time between living in Aspen, CO and working seasonally thus traveling for months out of the year – then buying property and building a house in Virginia with my partner two years ago while going to nutrition school in NYC – seeing clients in various parts of the country – traveling and studying yoga out of the country for months at a time – now living between Aspen and Blacksburg, VA! I think I had about 3 months at “home” this year. I have friends all over the world that I cherish… but have I made time for them? What about community when you’re all over the place?
Then it hits me when I’m sitting with someone I love… how amazing it is to have these special connections and it fills me with gratitude… this is what I truly want in life!
Now on a side note, I must say… the quality of the people in your life is key. How does it feel to be around the people in your life? Don’t be afraid to let go of relationships that don’t feel right. Now, there’s something to look at with that as well, though. It’s something you have to be super honest with yourself about or ask some one you trust. If you find that you end up in conflict and drama with most people in your life… I say gently, “you might have to take a deeper look at yourself and what you are putting out…” that’s a whole other topic but I wanted to put it out there for when you’re looking to create the most healthy, vibrant community for yourself.
Why it is critical for your health and happiness to make lots of time for your quality friends and build the RIGHT relationships…
- Gets you out of your head
- You are free to be who you are
- They will love you when you forget to love yourself
- It reminds you of who you really are
- It’s fun
- You get to play
- You get to share
- You get to be known
- Reminds you of what is important in life
- They’ll remember stories about you that you don’t
It’s important to think about the kinds of people you want in your life… as I’ve heard so many times now, “you become the 5 people you spend your most time with”. Who’s rubbing off on you? Who do you want to be? Do you have the connections in your life you crave? Do you make time for the connections you cherish?
I am so thrilled to have reconnected with some old friends this year (I give my shout out – you know who you are!) and began to make some new friends too. My intentions towards friendship and community this year are to grow the friendships I have, connect with new people in my local community, play with others that share my passions, serve the clients that can hear and use my message to live radiantly and partner with other online entrepreneurs to collaborate and share this unique experience we have. Have you connected with me yet? I look forward to it! (You can Join me on Facebook – say I sent ya 
)
Why is it important for you to make time for your friends? Please add your comments below!
The Afterburn…
It’s been over a week now since we drove away from Black Rock City. It’s hard to believe actually. It’s been challenging even to find what I want to write because I could go so many directions. Burning Man was magical… I can’t imagine it not being so. Since my last post spoke to why Burning Man is so amazing, I thought I’d share the challenging side to be real.
It’s much easier to do now while it’s fresh, than in a year from now when everything has turned in to blissful playa moments. Just as I wrote in my last post; having so much fear previous to going and not remembering having a moment of it the whole time I was there. It was true I didn’t remember it… now I do! Can we live in a magical place and have nothing arise? The reality is that it is a perfect place for it all to arise, be present with and move through.
The conditions of Burning Man are perfectly intense to poke and provoke. Starting from the pre-playa planning and all that it takes to prepare and get there in the first place. Then setting up camp. Living in the dust, heat, wind, cold, and storms (although this year was particularly pleasant – all of these conditions are still present). Packing up and leaving then getting home and cleaning EVERYTHING is all a major ordeal as well. It really is quite a pilgrimage.
And yes there are different ways to do it, from flying straight into Black Rock City where some one is waiting with your fully equipped RV and a meal plan to hitching in with only a back pack. Yet, there is a bond of living in this city that we all are a part of no matter how we got there, live there, and leave.
Matt and I camp in a large tent, have two coolers and bring a tent for costumes to share with our camp. I am a creature of comfort being a Leo, so I’m always inventing systems to support my need for some basic comforts. I can feel my standards rising all the time… small camper for next year, sounds good to me! I have roughed it around the world and have declared the stamp of “I can do this”. Not looking to prove anything any more. I recognize that I can tolerate most anything and I don’t really want to choose tolerating anymore… how about creating the comfort I crave!
Besides being challenged by comfort this year, my next hurdle was the afterburn… integration of the playa into my life at home and business. I have stepped up into a new level of responsibility this year starting a new business (or two), and I could feel my “I work when I want to” free spirit throw a tantrum. Really? Do you want all this responsibility? I felt myself internally retreating.
I watched as Alexis Martin Neely and Russell Feingold got married this year at Burning Man and the day she got back, Alexis was on coaching calls! Instead of judging and comparing myself, I view it as an inspiration – to be that comfortable in your business and in your play that there is no separation or transition time required. Alexis, Russell, Matt and I talked about wearing different hats vs being fully who you are and want to be in life and in business, which also helps to be seamless from play to business. If you embody who you truly are and show up 100% as that, you serve your clients and yourself so much more.
I realized that yes, there is more responsibility in my life and with that comes purpose, service, and connection… how can I resist that?
P.S. The picture really is of the explosion of the Burning Man… Matt got a great shot didn’t he?
Burning Man: Naked People and Drugs… or Something Else?
I know Burning Man has quite a reputation… People I encounter have various reactions to Burning Man and the fact that I go. I get “oh, I didn’t know you were ‘that’ type”. I smile. I didn’t know once either.
I’ll be honest. Before I went to Burning Man, my reaction to it was fear. Fear of feeling uncomfortable. Fear that my boundaries were going to be pushed in every way possible. Fear of isolation, like I wouldn’t belong. Fear I wouldn’t be weird enough to have fun. Fear I was going to be the only one who felt that way. Whole lotta fear. When we got there, the greeters rolled me in the dirt at the gate and I can’t remember having a moment of fear the whole time I was there.
Here’s what I found the experience to REALLY be about.
- Living in the Present Moment -Leaving the structure of your life behind opens the space for all that is… right in front of you. That really is all that really exists anyway, but Burning Man has a way of really making it impossible to be anywhere but in the moment.
- Connection – There is a space that is created when masses of people are truly present that leaves the door wide open to real connection.
- Community – Being a part of such a huge event that has so many subcultures within, there are so many ways to engage in a community that really resonates with you.
- Creativity – What I am sooooo impressed with is how important creativity is in some peoples’ lives that they invest their time, energy, money, heart and soul in creating unbelievable structures and experiences all for us to enjoy, partake in and discover our own deeper creativity.
- Expression – Wear the wackiest things you can think of just because it’s fun.
- Play!
- Exploring Beyond Social Norms – you can always experience something you wouldn’t normally, if you want to.
- Leaving Connecting Through Technology Behind - as much as I love social media and my online world – only connecting in person for a whole week is amazing.
- Awakening New Possibilities for Yourself
- No Money – no selling, no buying, no advertising.
- Self Sufficiency - pack-in, pack-out everything you could possibly need or want for the week.
I believe Burning Man can be anything you want it to be. So I’m off! I’ll come back and share the juice from this year’s magic place… did I mention I was camping with clowns this year?
“It’s Food Rachelle, You Eat It”
Yes, that is what an ex-boyfriend of mine said to me as we struggled with where to eat. I was difficult. Full on, I know that. Every boyfriend I have had has made me very aware of that, as every relationship I was in, food has become an issue. I always asked, “did you ever have this much trouble with food and your ex’s?”. No. Well, I know I’m not the only one, but I realized it was a problem!
I would fret about what to eat and throw fits that it’s so hard to find healthy, yummy food out (yummy has always been important to me). Unless you are in L.A. or NYC or some other really cool place that is just on it, it can be challenging to find that criteria – healthy and yummy. Well, rarely was I so lucky… thus angst arose in my relationships every time “what should we eat” came up.
My lack of clarity around food and lack of an action plan to feed myself when and what I needed was quite miserable and permeated into the relationship because, well, we eat 3x’s a day!
So instead of this story getting better at this point… it get’s worse. 
After years of having high standards that were hard to meet, I decided to take that boyfriend’s advice (we were no longer together). “It’s food Rachelle, you eat it”. So I did. I said F*** it and ate it. And ate it. Then guess what? Well, then I just got fat. 
Okay, so let’s cut to the chase and fast forward so we can get to the happy ending! I wish I could say there is a magic trick to transforming your relationship to food and what to eat… but I have to admit it takes some very practical actions.
My Guide to Eating – Part 1
- Plan – oh how boring, right?! It actually is really empowering and fun to enter mealtime with what you want ready and prepared (oops that’s the next one).
- Prepare – always make more so you always have leftovers and have things ready to go to make a quick salad (video coming on this!).
- Define your “default foods” then redefine them if they need to be upgraded. Have a few go-to options for breakfast, lunch and dinner so that if you have neglected to plan you are still okay-doke.
- Take things with you to go when you’re out for the day if you know you don’t have good places to go eat.
- If you’re traveling - GOOGLE Find out where health food stores, raw food restaurants etc. are before hand and make them a destination!
- Take responsibility (blah, blah, blah) Really though, “it’s not fair” is a terrible place to live! Create your own choices and make your reality what you want – even when things don’t go your way. Your reality is simply how you relate to it all!
- Laugh, Play and don’t take yourself too seriously.
I hope you enjoyed! Can you relate? Check out My Boyfriend Made Me Fat
Join Me!